Love Thy Neighbor

When we lived in Florida we had an unusual family living next door. It was two elderly sisters. We called them Sister One & Sister Two because their names (whatever they were) didn’t seem to sit well on their shoulders....matter of fact the names were so mismatched we could never remember who was who. Thus~ Sister One & Sister Two. You know, I just realized that we thought they were quite elderly then but, upon reflection, they were probably 60ish! Amazing how much older 60 was in the 1980's! Or....maybe it wasn’t....actually...60 is 60...but this isn’t about age now, is it? Most of y’all (there’s that favorite word of mine again) lie about your age anyway...OR...you tell the truth about your age but you have had so much "work" that everyone says how wonderful you look at your age....yeah...you know who you are-I’m not gonna out you.

Anyway, the sisters were smitten with MamasBoy because he was so dadgummed cute. He made you smile just to look at him. As a matter of fact he endeared himself to them the first day we moved in. He picked the most beautiful magnolia blossoms off the bush out front and took them over to the ladies. They came over and thanked us profusely and said, "Oh my! What a sweet and wonderful child you have there." About an hour later, they came back looking a bit distressed to inform us that MamasBoy had picked ALL the magnolias off the "special" tree in their own front yard. I didn’t quite have the guts to ask what made it so special. Besides, the unspoken message was to please keep him off their lawn no matter how cute he was.

Sister One was a sourpuss...never married...never had children...never laughed (that I could see). Sister Two had a daughter that was not the brightest bulb in the GE factory. She had an even dimmer spouse. We could never remember their names either so we just called them Nit & Wit. Nit (because he was always scratching his head) and Wit because she was the smarter of the two. I once asked her how they met and she said she went into an I SCREAM store (actually she said Ice cream-but if you could see him you would think I SCREAM). She said it was love at first sight. Uh-huh..I didn’t ask......Nuff said.

Nit & Wit traveled together. You never saw one without the other. They also had a couple of special traveling companions. Two yowling and howling Siamese cats. The cats had the whole back seat to themselves...complete with litterbox on the floor and a bowl of soft cat food. Imagine the smell on a hot Florida day. Ready? Imagine ....NOW.....okay...STOP...it is too gross to imagine. God bless them-they were happy with the life they had and loved each other-what more could you ask for?

Our "friendship" came to an abrupt end one fine sunny day. Sister One was outside grubbing around in her bushes when Older Son threw a big, black rubber snake over the fence and INTO the bushes where Sister One was working..AND...she fell AND she hurt her back.....AND...she went to the doctor......AND...Older Son mowed her lawn for her from that point on.....AND we moved before they could sue us!. Sad to say ~We lost touch~ Just one more reason I am NOT on Facebook!