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Thursday, April 24, 2014

LOWE'S NEVER SAW IT COMING-NEITHER DID -

Grab your coffee cuz I think this is
the longest post I have ever done.

Some of my newer followers don't know  
THE REAL SWEETCHEEKS
so
I noted this down about 3 years ago
when SweetCheeks was FOUR YEARS OLD.
It was funny then and I think it is still funny.


I picked SweetCheeks up

to give her Mom time

to do their taxes

a couple of weeks ago

uninterrupted.

Imagine that!

I told my daughter that

I had to go to Lowes

but I would take

SweetCheeks with me.

SweetCheeks immediately

informed me that she

hated Lowes.

I think her exact words were~

I HAHTE LOWES, NANA!

Too bad!

Do you want to go with Nana

or stay with Mom and

stay quiet so she

can work on taxes?

*big sigh*

I'hll go witth yohu

but I stihll hate Lowes!

She brightened a bit

when I told her they had

flowers and we would find

something to do with

gardening that she could have

to "help me" come summer.

Immediately upon walking

in we found it..

the perfect thing..

a DorathuExplhoharh

watering can.

She smiled sweetly

and was a very good girl

while I found what I needed.


 Of course, before I left the store 

I had to go to the bathroom.

I don't know why because

I only drank about 4 cups of

coffee and had

ONE STARBUCKS LATTE.


~Do you think they will ever

pay me for all the free advertising I

give them~

Anyway.
.
IN THE BATHROOM

the conversation goes something like

this...
.
SC: I dohn't haffta go.

Me: Well, I do.
.
There is noone in here so just

sit tight and look at

your cute self in the mirror

while Nana goes potty.

SC: Oh-kay...

I close Door#1 behind me.

I hear footsteps coming in
.
and peek through the crack

(why are we all so paranoid)

to make sure SweetCheeks is

still right where I can see her.

She is still looking at herself in

the mirror.



I uh...ummm..you know- tinkle-

for lack of a more technical term-

and go out to wash my hands.

I get my camera out to

take some pics of SweetCheeks

making faces at herself in the mirror.


SC: Nana?

Me: Yes, honey?

SC: Did yohu see that wooman?

(Oh dear Lord in Heaven...

please...please...please...

it is echo-y in here and the

water is too quiet to drown

out any "secrets")

SC: Nana?

Me: Are we ready to go, SweetCheeks?

SC: Noh...NANA!?

Me: What? (whispering)

SC: Did you see that lady?

Me: No..

I can't help myself..I am taking pictures.

SC: Her looks like this...


Lord...please..please...please

don't let me start to laugh...

SC: Her dusn't haff eny teeth..

her looks like this...

My face starts burning..

SweetCheeks is smiling happily..
.
like she has uncovered a nice

big secret.

Me: Shhhhh...I whisper..That's

not nice....

Let's go..

(It is not lost on me that her shirt says

SASSY)


SC: Okay..Nana...

But you know whut else?

(silently to myself...I am NOT asking)

SC: Yohu know how come I knohw that...

cuz hers smiled at me.

I think hers smiled at me cuz

hers liked my

Dorha the Explorah

water can.

I hear rustling..

I hear flushing..

but I am OUT THE DOOR..

before I have to

see the poor soul

that was locked behind

Door Number Two.

SweetCheeks last words?

SC: Nana~WHY arhe yohu ahlways

is such a hurrhy?


It could be because I

don't want to get

"the look"...

you know..

"the look"

the one reserved for people

that can't keep their

kids "in tow".

I'll take my chances with

letting the chatter flow

because you never know

what pearls of wisdom

will drop from the mouths of babes.

Of course, you gotta take the good

with the bad...

If they say the wrong thing....

Just look at them like they belong to

someone else and pretend you 

are babysitting.

It worked with my own kids 

and it works even  better

with grandkids!

You have a great day and remember

PUT YOUR TEETH IN BEFORE

you go to Lowe's.

You never know when you might run into a

SWEET CHEEKS!

You can still sign up for

my giveaway here!

It is open until I see SweetCheeks later

this week.

78 comments:

  1. I think we've all been in those moments with children. At least you (and now we) got a good laugh out of it. Sometimes it's just as bad with my 91 year old - and hard of hearing- father in law who talks to himself out loud very loudly...oh man!

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  2. Out of the mouths of babes. I can totally relate. The lack of filtering makes life interesting at times. Hugs!

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  3. I can't get enough of sweet cheeks stories

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  4. Thanks for making me laugh today!!!

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  5. ha...i have to tell that to my old country man neighbor who just may run into sweet cheeks one day at lowes... This is too cute and funny. Kids say the most sweetest innocent things even if it makes are faces turn red. The other day my 8 year old told the doctor "umm, i don't want to be mean, but you need to shave" have a wonderful day.

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  6. Diana, We can't help but laugh. Those photos of SC is adorable. My granddaughter , who is getting married in June...that is how old my story is..Lynzie saw a man while waiting to check out of a store, she is sitting in the cart ,about 4 years old. My daughter Liz said the man only had two teeth.. She is thinking, just as you were, "help me"...Well Lynzie sees him smiling at her and says, "You got two teeth...do you brush 'em ?" Liz said she thought she'd die before she could get out of that store. Kids will say what they think...that is what is so funny. I love these stories. xoxo,Susie

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  7. Hahaha That was a good laugh! My kids didn't say a word when they were in situations like this one, but the look they gave the person was very embarrassing too!

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  8. Can anyone remember when theycould be this unworried, uncomplicated, free????

    Nope!

    We left that state, a long, long, long time ago...

    More's the pity...

    Well, not a pity to stop noticing out-loud, things which might "hurt" someone. But a pity, that we lost the sponteniety of childhood. (Yess, I know that's not spelled right, and don't have spell-checker in comments, so..... I'm going with my inner child, and leaving the misspelled word, in here!!!!!) -grin-

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  9. that little monkey!

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  10. Oh, Diana, starting my day with such a priceless SweetCheeks story is the best! Our oldest was very much like her ... we never knew when exactly what she was thinking was going to come out of her cute little mouth. One incident that I remember was as we were being seated in a restaurant, in the days when there was a Smoking section. We walk past a couple on the way to our table, the man is smoking, and our little dear says, "Mom, he's smoking and that makes you die." I like to think that that may have been the motivation that man needed to kick the habit.

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  11. Just keep on telling SweetCheek stories and I'll be as happy as can be! She truly cracks me up and the way you deliver her stories, hysterical! Two peas in a pod, you two!!

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  12. Yes, I will definitely put my teeth in before I go out shopping today :)

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  13. Ha,ha,ha,ha When I have a grandchild, I want it to be just like her. A girl after my own heart. She is so funny!

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  14. That's our SweetCheeks! ... I'm headed out for paint today. I'll be sure I'm presentable. You never know who's watching!

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  15. I love what a child can say at times, mostly the truth! Other times what we want to say, but we have some manners! Sometimes I want to ask others did you not floss? Or did you never get to use Mighty Whitey toothpaste as a child. Tell Sweet Cheeks this is why she must brush her teeth two to three times a day. Look first thing in the morning and you got me started.
    Why don't they let people use food stamps for dental work, cause it's a bit hard to eat the food without teeth., or my favorite(they allow people to use food stamps on edible marijuana food products)
    Okay I feel sorry for some people that have no teeth,but it is mostly a lack of brushing.
    Why don't they teach that in school like make it a mandatory elective....
    Sorry, I will wait till I have had another cup of coffee before I reply again, next time that is if there is a next time.. Are you going to de-friend me??
    Me Mrs. Flossy

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  16. Honest observations by children can make us squirm can't it . lol

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  17. Thanks for the warning...I'm heading to Lowe's soon!

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  18. LOL! Let it be known the world over! You need to put your teeth in when you go out in public!!

    Nicely written!!

    Greetings from Minneapolis,

    Pearl

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  19. LOL - kids are honest though, aren't they?
    Gotta love it!! Vicki

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  20. Love SweetCheeks! Did you see Heaven is for Real yet? I believe what young kids say over grownups any day!

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  21. Hahaha!
    So funny-- Put your teeth in...
    You and Sweet Cheeks... have some pretty funny stories to tell.
    Pat

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  22. "Just look at them like they belong to someone else and pretend you are babysitting." THAT is hilarious!!! That's one of my new favorite quotes of all time! Thanks for the laughs!!

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  23. Stories of Sweet Cheeks always remind me of similar stories of my youngest son. "Mommy, why did that Pirate give me a balloon?" was what he said after a nice man who lost his eye and wore an eye patch gave him a balloon. Sweet Cheeks needs to meet my son when they are both grown.

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  24. Too funny, Diana! Bet you just wanted to run back in the stall and hide! It's so fun to see how much the girls have grown up in the last few years. I wonder if that poor woman ever got any teeth?:)

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  25. Hahhhaaaa...too cute and...I've been there.....Done that !!!

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  26. You do have fun with your grands - I wonder what they will think when they read your blogs later in life.

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  27. oh this has been a real laugh in the ladies parlor. Oh you never know what comes out of your G. Child's mouth. Mine were the same. That was good that the lady was not there with the facial expression she was showing and you took.. Oh wouldn't that of been something. . I so enjoy your blogs. My computer had been down. It is up and running now. So I have missed some of your blogs. I did mange also to run over and say pick me Sweet-cheeks for a prize.

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  28. LOL... Too funny! It brings back lots of memories of thing my own kids did, though. Little ones with mouths with no filters. LOL Andrew once asked a really BIG Fat man in the check out line where he bought his underwear. He asked really politely like, "Excuse me, sir. But, where do you buy your underwear?" The man told him he ordered them online at a big and tall store, to which Andrew replied, "I thought so. They don't have any big enough here, do they?" I about died. And I didn't even think of the "I'm just babysitting" trick. If I had, I sure would have used it.

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  29. Leave it to the kids to embarrass us. You never know what they will say or do when you take them with you. Sweet cheeks is growing up so very fast and watching her has been amazing. You never really have a dull moment when she is there because you can never tell what is coming next. I just love them. Have a wonderful day. Hugs and Prayers from Your Missouri Friend.

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  30. Oh, I am surprised you don't get beat up in the parking lots more often! LOL- she was and always will be funny. You need to do a Nana and Sweetcheeks day and blog it now. I am still waiting to see her toothless smile. ;) Hope you have a very peaceful day, unless Tyler calls with the job! Then you can jump up and down all you want to.

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  31. Oh, what a ham she is. Never a dull moment with Sweet Cheeks!!
    I would've high tailed it out of there PDQ too.

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  32. Diana, Out of the mouths of babes! You never know what they will say next. Last week my seven year old grandson asked why we live with my dad. I explained to him that his great grandpa needed our help and that is what family do. I asked him wouldn't he take care of me when I get old. He looked at me puzzled and answered "how can I take care of you...I will only be 10". LOL.

    Hugs,
    Sherry

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  33. Ha Ha Diana you gotta love the innocence Sweet Cheeks has. Tooo funny. Love that kid!
    Kris

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  34. I would have probably wanted to stick around just to see the woman's face! Except I would have been howling with laughter and that would have made me leave. My kids used to get me into all kinds of trouble, because I never could stifle the giggles. They just seemed to spill out. Still do.
    Funny story, loved it!

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  35. Oh my goodness! She is so cute. She is wearing the appropriate shirt too. I have had that same thing happen to me before when my oldest son was little. He was talking about someone else at the grocery store (and not in a good way). I quickly said "shhhhh!" It happened again on a field trip while we were on a hay ride at a pumpkin farm. Unfortunately, I know the other parents heard what he said and I was mortified. I immediately felt my face turning red. You are so right about what comes out of the mouth of babes. They are boldly honest!

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  36. You had me at the edge of my seat! So cute and funny!
    When our oldest daughter was about three, daddy had her in his cart at the grocery store. A dude with a bright blue Mohawk, heavily chained up and tattooed went by. "LOOK! HAIR! HAIR!" she shouted. Poor daddy. No skills fighting muscle bound guys half his age even to this day!

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  37. Oh my goodness! I'm still laughing! I love her shirt, "Sassy", hummmm? She's got such a great sense of humor and an adorable smile! Out of the mouth of babes! I'm not getting my feed to your blog and cannot sign up again. I don't know what is going on.

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  38. Just as funny the 2nd time around! Write a book with all the things you have in this blog, and now there are new members that may give a few jewels to the crown.

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  39. Oh my gosh, I can't stop laughing. This is totally something my Sawyer would do to me or his mama when she was his age. I'll have to tell you the one sometime about my oldest daughter, when she was about 3 or 4, telling a lady she had rotten teeth. I like to have died!

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  40. I remember a particularly uncomfortable moment with my daughter in the doctors office. We had been teaching her to say eyes, ears, nose, etc. and she kept pointing at a woman, who had one eye on her cheekbone, and saying 'eye'. I thought I would die!

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  41. Kids say the darnedest things, don't they? I love how innocent they say it. Sweet Cheeks certainly made me laugh today! xo

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  42. Oh we had such a politically incorrect moment with our son when he was small. Thankfully the person involved was so sweet and didn't get upset. But, you can't control everything!!

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  43. ROFL!!! She needed to be a contestant on Bill Cosby's show..."Kids Say the Darndest Thing". I always tell my moms of the kids I teach, "I will believe half of what they tell me, if you'll believe half of what they tell you!"

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  44. Hahahahaha, love this and yes, been there too! Gosh, brought me back to memories of the Dennis the Menace show and poor Mr. Wilson! ;)

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  45. Oh, Lol! This is too funny and brings back some memories. Don't they just say the funniest things - pure honesty and innocence. How many times have I had to slink out of a store.....These make great stories for family reunions. xo Karen

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  46. Gosh, this brings back way to many bathroom stories. This may be the funniest ever!! Oh my sides are hurting....excuse me while I go get my teeth...haha.

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  47. Kids are the best! Wish we were so natural and spontaneous as children, for ever and taking things as they are. period!
    Oh I've had incredible moments with my own girls, specially Sofia and yeah, she's my Little funny Cayetana's mother now, lol!
    Now I have to hear all the funny stuff she did and said back in NYC while vacationing there!
    I love your Sweet Cheeks though, what would life be without our grands, I think everyone should have one at least...hehehehhhheeee

    FABBY

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  48. Cute story Diana. I think Sweet Cheeks was just telling it like it is. As adults we all wish we could do the same. Love her cuteness.

    hugs
    Sissie

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  49. OMG!! TOO FUNNY!!!!!
    Kids do say the funniest things, don't they? You always bring a smile to my face!!

    hugs,
    Deb

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  50. LOL, I knew something good was gonna come out of her sweet cheeks mouth but that was CLASSIC!!! hahaha. Try walking around the store with MY granddaughter, she has Down's Syndrome and she thinks that allows her to get away with ANYTHING, like smacking people on the BEHIND and laughing out loud, or giving bear hugs to random strangers, yeah, you should see the look on their faces. But I love her to death and she brings the sunshine where ever she goes!

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  51. Loved every detail of your time at Lowes with your little entertainer! She is the cutest!

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  52. Loved your story. You better not ask kids anything as they tell it just like it is. Sweet Cheeks is adorable.

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  53. GOSH, me and sweetcheeks are twins:) there's very little filter between my thoughts and my mouth too, which really makes life interesting when you can't use the,, "I'm 4" excuse ..lol lol..

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  54. Oh, this is hilarious! I could just see you two..lol funny? Now..yes! Then, not so much!

    Blessings your sweet little girl!
    Gert

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  55. Oh my.....it's so fun to take them shopping, isn't it? Charlotte says things that make me shoot Dr. Pepper out my nose!!
    There's one in every family.
    xo

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  56. Oh my! And to think I only had boys and have never had the joy of little girls and all of their 'cute' ways! Enjoy your evening my friend! Some day she'll grow up and have her own blog and we'll hear HER side of the story! hahaha!

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  57. HA!!!! This was awesome!!!! She just makes my day when you share stories about her and her thoughts on things!!!! Hey...she calls it like she sees it!! And you cracked me up when you were looking through the cracks...I have no idea why we are all so paranoid!?!?! Loved this one friend....and her expressions are priceless!!! Happy day to you!!! Nicole xoxo

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  58. This was so cute an funny, and anyways any women would forgive SC for what she said cause she's just too cute not too! I'd of run out the door fast too, but then in my life it's would of been more me saying what SC said, I'm always opening my mouth and saying ???? things. Have a great day!

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  59. I have said on occasion: "not my child, not mine" lol

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  60. Oh my. The thing about kids is they just say it. :) Funny.

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  61. She is quite the kid - and it is truly scary what kids can say to embarrass you in public, isn't it! :-)

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  62. Diana, I'm so glad it was Sweet Cheeks that said that and not one of mine-but I don't get many chances to take the grands out alone-because if I take one, I have to take all 11. This was hysterical!!!!
    Hope you are having a good week.
    Hugs,
    Noreen

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  63. So funny! I bet miss sassy is really going to enjoy reading your blog when she gets a bit older.

    xo Danielle

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  64. So funny...and kids really do say some embarrassing things in public sometimes...

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  65. From the mouth of babes. One time when my son was about three, we were in Wendy's. A man walked in who looked like Don King with the high hair. I keep turning my little ones head around because I knew him. I couldn't keep him occupied long and he blurted out, "Look at that man's head." I lost it! He said whatever came to mind. Oh the joy of the little ones.

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  66. Oh that is so funny! How many times have my little ones embarrassed me!

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  67. Now, we not only have to keep our teeth in at night, we also have to make sure they are in if we go shopping?? Goodness me!! Pretty soon we'll have to leave them in 24/7...sheesh😁😁😁

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  68. Good morning and what a funny story. Sweet Cheeks is just adorable! Have a wonderful day and weekend.
    Julie

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  69. Love, love, love! Great story teller because I got caught up in the moment! Sweet Cheeks is adorable! xox

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  70. Kids will say the most blunt things, won't they? I'm glad she got a Dora watering can to take home with her. I hope she picks ME today for the giveaway haha.

    love,
    ~Sheri

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  71. Ah, kids! This is one of the cutest stories ever!

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  72. Out of the mouths of babes! :) They are so clear and honest until they are shushed by adults. So much fun to be with!

    xo
    Pat

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  73. Shes so funny, I love the fact that kids have no filter! xo

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  74. OMG I laughed out loud reading this one!!! LOVE Sweet Cheek stories!

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  75. I so enjoyed the trip to Lowes with you two. No wonder you call that pretty dimpled little doll Sweet Cheeks...she is adorable!

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  76. Sweet cheeks is the sweetest sassy girl I know! I think maybe she should have her own tv show! xxo

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