LET THE SHOW BEGIN!

I did a post about this

early on--when I first started posting..

but..because I am going to

talk about a special

Christmas tradition tomorrow..

I wanted to acquaint some of my

new readers with this first.

You have never seen a show

quite like a show

performed by

the one

the only

SWEETCHEEKS!

This happened about 9 months ago..

and is as funny today

as it was then.

SweetCheeks is a performer of

extra-ordinary talent. It's a lot like

pay-per-view except she is

a lot more expensive.

Her best performances are usually

preceded by the words..

"Hey, guys..wanna see sumthin'?

(as if we had a choice)

She got the stunning new outfit you

see above for Christmas last year.

It seems to fit her personality

which runs from flamboyant

to downright outrageous.

And, although she likes to pretend

she is a princess..

she is much better as her

own character.

Take a seat, ladies and gentlemen,

the show is about to begin.

This entails lining up on the couch

in our assigned seats.

We always have to leave a space

(or two) for those "friends"

that we can't see.

(We know they are there because

SweetCheeks tells them where

to sit and they get the primo seats).

After we have plunked ourselves down,

the ticket collector takes our stubs.

She looks suspiciously like the actor,

and director, and performer

of the show

we are about to see.

If it is an especially exciting show

we must also fasten our seat belts.

Don't ask because I don't know..

but I think "we" sometimes

have SHOWS and

AMUSEMENT PARK RIDES

a bit mixed up.

Makes no difference.

Here comes the announcement...

WADIES & GUNTULMANS..

WEWCUM TO THU SHOOW!

Now I gonna dance and sing

ouprah

(that would be opera for those

in the know)

Oh Boy! I can't wait.

I am already laughing while

MyHero has that

deer-in-the-headlights-look

the one that means

OH NO-NOT AGAIN.

Buck up Buddy! This will

be over before you know it.

By the time the first few lines

of Jowly Old St. Nickkolus float out

I am suffused with laughter.

At this point

the show

STOPS!

THISSS PLAYH ISSS NOTT FUNNY!

NOW- Stay in yoah seats..

we are gonna haffta starht all

ovearh again!

This statement is accompanied by

a dramatic sigh and

an arm swiped across the brow.

The seat belts must be

refastened and tickets collected

once again.

The show resumes.

I look over at MyHero who

whispers out of the side of his mouth,

without moving his lips..

I can't wait for the intermission.

And, once again,

the strains of

JOWLY OLD ST. NICKOLUS

fills the room.