Tuesday, August 31, 2010

Forever Frozen Faces X

Deviled Legs
Well, one minute we was both
just a'standing guard here..
and then..
and then...
and then Albert over there..
well, Albert he
said somthing smart to one of those
Eye-tallian girls when she walked by.
She gave him the evil eye
and when I looked over...
well....lookit....
you can see for yerself.

Monday, August 30, 2010

PEARL IS A JEWEL

Some of you know I work shift work
at a hospital.
Sometimes I miss exciting adventures
when I work the 11am to 7:30pm shift.
Sometimes I am happy
that I have missed
an adventure.
Case in point....
Can you guess what MyHero purchased
whilst I was working?
Yep! Geez! How did you guess?
The behemoth pictured below is now my own!
Somedays I just don't know how I can
ever truly
Thank God enough
for having MyHero share my life.
Yessireee...I love all the
little surprises that he
brings to brighten up my day.
Some of them are right up there
with the dead mice
my cat used to bring me..
At least those I could
dig a hole for and bury.
But this...
this is
THE PEARL
and I think it would take a whole
lotta digging to bury this baby!
My daughter, Mimi came to visit
to see The Pearl..
cuz she didn't really believe that
I got A Pearl for my
anniversary.
Was it what you were expecting, honey?
To showcase the masterpiece
MyHero invited
the grandkids,
MamasBoy & TheSecretAgent,
Mimi & BabyE to take
her on her maiden voyage.
Destination?
Frosty Tip in Dyckesville.
Yes! That's right!
I said DYCKESVILLE!
About 10 miles from home.
Here we are...
At the top of the ramp off the highway..
Wait! Wait! What's that spluttering noise?
Oooooppps!
PEARL has gasped and
died because
SOMEONE,
who shall remain nameless..
Forgot to give her a drink!
And I'm thinking PEARL
LIKES TO DRINK!
I'm thinking she is one
expensive date.
Now me? I'm a cheap date
because I don't drink much..
Guess we'll see how much MyHero
likes supporting his new girlfriend's
drinking habit!
Back to the road trip here...
Hmmm...we can see the
little town ahead...
Only a mile away..
MamasBoy thinks (and says)
We can coast 'er in.
Kids are all excited..
Hey Papa! How come we're going so slow?
Coast...coast...coast...
Coasting past the sign.
Coast....coast...coast...
You would not believe the assortment
of people that you see
standing in front of this sign
having their picture taken.
Yeah...most of them have
out-of-state license plates...
and that's all I'm saying about that!

Look, Papa, Look!I can see the sign now...

It is straighway ahead...off in the distance...but poor PEARL
has s-l-o-w-e-d to a stop!

MyHero to the rescue...

He & MamasBoy & TheSecretAgent

jump out and proceed to

PUSH PEARL!
All of a sudden..Lulu starts shouting

out the window..

Stop! Papa! Stop!

We're here! There's the Frosty Tip!But Papa keeps going!

Lulu sadly waves good-bye to

FrostyTrip.

SweetCheeks uses her newest line...

I hate this wurhld!

Papa doesn't care what anyone thinks

because PEARL needs a drink

BEFORE

there are any ice cream treats.

Ahhhh....So Good!

Gas for one~

and finally....

Ice Cream for all.

All except Ria who was staying

overnight at a friend's house.

The next morning when she

came over she told

Lulu that she wanted to take

a ride in the

orange PLANE too!

Lulu said...it is NOT a plane, Ria..

It's a bus!

It's not a bus, Lulu..it's a PLANE
cuz Nana said that

Papa was FLYING solo

until he painted that thing!

Just as she finishes her conversation
the doorbell rings.
It is the next door neighbor..
She says that they can
smell diesel oil
and it appears to be coming from...
Yep! You guessed it
THE PEARL.
I rush around to the back garage
to check her out..
She looks okay
(well-as okay as she CAN look)
from the front..
But wait...
WHAT IS THAT?
WHAT IS THAT LIQUID
COMING OUT OF HER BEHIND?
Hmmm...looks like OIL to me..
Do you suppose
The Pearl
will be visiting
The Pearly Gates soon?
.....to be continued......

Sunday, August 29, 2010

The Most Beautiful Bella

Look. How. Sweet. This.Face.Is.This is Bella-
The beautiful Bella.
I'll bet you think I know her, don't you?
I'll bet you think that she is related to me..
Right?
Wrong!
Dead wrong!
She is going to be very surprised to see this here..
Because I didn't ask..
But....I forgot to say a proper
Thank You a few days ago.
And.... because I am a bit of a "thief"..
I "stole" her picture
because I want you all to know how
Very Dear She Really Is.
She mentioned she had a few seeds left
if anyone wanted to sign up.
I wanted-I signed up.
She delivered.
Now when most of my friends give me seeds
they just kind of thrust them into
a plastic bag and say ...
Here ya go..
Well...except for my friend, Patti,
from a gardening group..
Her presentations are pretty great.
But Bella?
OH MY GOODNESS BELLA!
Look what you sent...
Notice that I have cleverly
disguised both of our names.
Am I smart, or what?
Never mind...Well...I love lavender...
I smiled when I opened the envelope.
I smiled again when I opened the
tissue paper and saw
this~

By the time I turned the little
packet over I was grinning right out loud.
The back of this sweet little seed packet
says..
Flowers Feed The Soul
Hugs, Bella

Well, my dear,
Flowers MAY feed the soul
but you have fed
my heart!
YOU are one of the true treasures
in BlogLand.
ps...Just wondering...would you mind coming
here and, you know, like doing
ALL my gardening?
Please...please...I'll feed you and ply
you with music and food and
my little SweetCheeks and Company
can entertain you...
Huh? What do you mean you have
YOUR OWN
life to tend to?
*sigh*
Thanks anyway!
xxoo Diana

Saturday, August 28, 2010

Forever Frozen Faces IX

Moving DayWell~Sure I'll help ya, BillyBob~
but when ya said ya was
moving I wasn't quite
'specting this was what ya meant.

Friday, August 27, 2010

Doing A Bit Of Research

Sorry Folks~ You will have to read this whole
blipping blog to know
what I want to research..
Otherwise you will NEVER understand.
The day started with this
sweet baby-getting up late
and taking his morning bottle.
BabyE is the little boy light of my life. We dressed him and popped him in the car
for a trip to the fabric store.
I'll save that story for another day.
He's loving on his little blue baby.
Don't tell his Dad cuz I don't think
he thinks boys should have dolls-
but MamasBoy had a doll and he
is so loving and wonderful with kids-
Can't hurt-right?
And, besides that~ Mama said it was okay.
She can fight with Dad about that on her own time..
Later...
Away from MY house....
Look! How! Cute!We shop and rush home because there is
a Packer game tonight.
You know what that means right?
The whole city bows down in
adoration and swoons over
The Pack!
You know what else it means, don't you?
Yeah...TPot needs a babysitter,
as does Mimi,
so they can go to the game.
Guess who gets nominated for
THAT job?
Yep! Me!
Wish I could complain but I offered
willingly and lovingly...
cuz I love these monsters (er I mean babies)
like there is no tomorrow.
As soon as they get there..
you readers know the routine by now..
RUSH the hidey hole..
Lulu is bent out of shape because
Ria beat her to the punch
and TOLD her what she was getting.
Yeah...she hates that...
And Ria KNOWS she hates that..
It's a sisterly thing.
Look at Ria's face in the background..
I just told her not to tell Lulu everytime.
She said in her whispery, papery little voice..
I DON'T tell her EVERYTIME...
Yeah ! Right-And I look like I'm 25~
Ria proceeds to show me that she
can execute a perfect handstand
from the tripod position.
She is a thing of beauty...
upside down..
with arched back and all.Not to be outdone by big sister
SweetCheeks says that
SHE can do a PURRFICKT headstand too!
After 4 attempts she did it...
see below....That was purrfeckt too, huh Nana?
Absolutely perfect, I tell her.
I know, she responds.
SweetCheeks is slowly coming around to realize that
BabyE is a pretty good audience..
He is also good entertainment.
When his Jack-In-The-Box
pops open and BabyE startles
SweetCheeks laughs so hard she
can hardly breathe.
Hims a funny boy, huh, Nana?
Yes he is, SweetCheeks..
He's almost as funny as you are!
No-Hims NOT! Hims will
NEVAH be as funny
as me!I start preparing dinner..
All my regular readers know that they love
A delicacy that only the true gourmet can appreciate.
See the wonderful little minds I am
expanding with all this exotic food? While I am preparing this feast
BabyE is eating...what else..
Goldfish...Are you getting
this seafood themed dinner party here?The entertainment has shown up on time.
Elmo is giggling and the acrobatic
girl is straddling two stools preparing
to do...
God only knows what~After dinner we wrap with blankets...
And play a bit of peek-a-boo..
In between all this I have cleaned the kitchen
run the vacuum..
taken sheets off the line..
remade a bed...
answered the phone that
never.stops.ringing..
And finally..just when I think the worst is over..
I look over and see this...Let me tell you something.
It is never a good thing when
someone puts
THEMSELF
in a time out.
SweetCheeks-WHY are you taking
a time out?
Uhhh..I fink I did sumthin naughty.
Well???? What did you do?
I just pourhed a little water
on the carpet by the TeeVFee.
WHY did you pour water on the carpet?
Cuz I was tryan to pourh it on
Lulu and hers moved!
At about this point MyHero opts to
ask me WHY I am so tired tonight.
Huh?
Here's the research project.
How long do you have to hold a pillow
over someone's head before they
stop breathing..
...just asking.......

Thursday, August 26, 2010

The Fairy Godmother

I would like to say that the conversations shown are exactly as spoken..
nothing more-nothing less..
The Princesses came to visit today.
They are spending the night.
As soon as they come in the door
(and check their hidey holes)
they shuck their clothes
and put on their
Princess costumes.
Today
Princess Ria is wearing a
costume from last year.
It is the MacDaddy of
costumes-lined and
beauteous!
You can't really see the material but it is shimmery and
when we found it we knew it would be
perfect for this little number.I told her she looked beautiful in her
Fairy Princess Costume.
SweetCheeks frowned..
Dat isss NOT da Fahree Pwrincesss
cosstume..Dass is da
Fahree Godmothah costume Nana!
I haff on da fahree princesss dwress!
Doan yoah know dat Nana?
Well...if I didn't before..
I do now.
Nana- Hmmm?
Can yoah take a piksure of me and Ria
cuz Ria is my whicked stepsitah and
hers goan to jail or sumthin lahter~
Hmmm..Amazing how quickly things change
in a 3 year old's world.
Well as you can see her wish is my command
(obviously)
Hey Nana! You should pwrobably wearh
a cosstume too.
Hmmm...I tell her...
SweetCheeks-you already HAVE a fairy godmother..
NOOOH, Nana...
Yoah isss the Whicked Whitch...
Yoah can cook us sum
gingerbrhed cookies an' den
dems can rhun away!
HUH?
I think you have the story a bit mixed up..
I will be the GOOD witch and make
some gingerbread boys
and we will EAT them! Okay?
Noooo...Nana...Yoah is NOT the GOOD Whitch
Yoah is the Whicked Whitch.
You can just eat
fwrogs or sumthin cuz yoah iss too bad
to eat cookies!
Yeah-I'll get right on that!

A few minutes later I look over and see this...
Say girls, I ask them...
What are you doing?
We arhe pwracticing for the
Owlimpkics!Can I practice too?
Noooh..you iss sooo old an' you might
bwreak sumthin..
or get dead.
Indeed I might..
Guess I will just sit tight and watch you!
Dasss good, Nana...Dass is berry good
cuz den yoah woant get hurt!
A few minutes after this SweetCheeks
comes out dressed in her
Princess Bride costume
complete with veil..
sorry-I missed the Photo Op.
I told her she looked beautiful.
She said,
Yah~I know dat!
I told her I hoped that someday I could
be sitting in the front row
of church when she
walked down the aisle to get married.
She looked at me with deep doubt in her eyes.
Nana, she said ever-so-sweetly,
If yoah isss dead nobuddy isss gonna see yoah
sitthing there...and yoah will be sooo sad.
Dass jus berry sad, Nana!
Indeed it is!
Hmmm...I wonder what she knows that
I doan know!

Wednesday, August 25, 2010

Forever Frozen Faces VIII

Horse Sense


Robert! If I told you once..


I've told you a million times...


Don't pay the man for a race horse


Until you've seen it!

Tuesday, August 24, 2010

One Lovely Blog Award-Huh?

Yeah...yeah...
You girls know the rules...
Most of you do anyway..
Ya gotta grab this button..
and then spill your guts..
about 7 things no one
knows about you.
Yeah...but if I TELL them
then they'll KNOW?
Is that how this works?
Well...leave it up to Laurie
to stick me with this sucker.
She is just trying to find out my
secrets so she can blackmail me..
I know her better than she thinks I do!

So...after I confess my every sin and unmentionable act..
What? Oh! It's not THAT kind of things you want to know?
Well...it IS...you know it is...but..baby..
THAT ain't gonna happen..
No sireeee...You are getting the watered down
version of my life.
Anyway...AFTER this I get to stick some other
poor unsuspecting soul with the task of
revealing everything they dare tell about themselves.
Ok-then...GAMES ON!
Ready?

1. Back in "the day"-don't you love that expression..Anyway, back in the day
when I was young and cute...
my first big REAL job was working for WBBH TV20
in Ft.Myers, FL. I even made a few little commercials
and was the Lee Carpet Girl (Lord how embarrassing that sounds now)
for a while.

2. I rode in the Edison Parade of Lights (in a ball gown)
on a float with Ronald McDonald. Nuff said!

3. I was the first WOMAN sales rep in the Southern USA for
Georgia-Pacific corp. I sold lumber to MEN in a world where
WOMEN did not sell LUMBER to men.
That's where I met MyHero...I'm not sure who sold whom a bill
of goods. (don't you love working whom into a sentence)

4. I was decorating before it became a "craze". I talked my
friend in Florida into selling all her fine things and she "countried up"
her house. Her relatives came from out of state and asked her if they had
lost all their money and did they have enough to eat...
yeah...I'm still laughing about that!

5. Hmmmm...this is no easy task...it's like..okay..I COULD
tell this..but do I really want people to KNOW...yeah..
Let's see....Working at my job in the hospital is one of the most
rewarding things I have ever done...it is also one of the most
heartbreaking...sometimes I go into the back room so I don't lose
it in front of a patient.

6. I like to drive. I drive everywhere. MyHero likes to ride. He rides everywhere.
I am the Princess Driver. I think it would be fun to drive one
of those stinking tourist buses around and tell people facts about the area.
I would have to live somewhere else to do this because this area is
all about the PACKERS. And I dunno nothin' bout those Packers. All I know is that Brett Favre (whose name is not pronounced like it is spelled) left the Packers.
I know there was a lot of whining and gnashing of teeth when that happened.
I know that when the Packers lose the Emergency Room is
extra busy. I know that they should have
a sign at the city limits that says.
You don't like football?
Please catch the next plane out of town.
You are not welcome here.
And that's about all I know about football.

7. I have found a whole new world here in Blogland. I can finally amuse someone
besides myself...and MyHero...who only thinks I
am funny on occassion. However, he dutifully laughs
because he likes clean undershorts and pressed shirts. Amen.

TA-DAH!
Now..here you go..
The next poor suckers to get this award are...
(as they say in the Acadamy Awards...in NO particular order)

1. MySummerhouse. Laura is just a sweetheart of a girl. She is a beautiful person
who knows the depth of life and loss and her blog is lovely...and so is she.

2. Bella'sRoseCottage Hosted by the Beautiful Bella (who else). Her blog is
as pretty as she is. You will find tea and treasures (including her).

3. SoManyThingsToLove Gabriele Augustini (doncha love that name)..it sounds
like she'a an exotic princess (or exotic dancer?-just sayin...) but NO she
is a painter of silk-the likes of which you have never seen.
But don't be calling her Gabby cuz she does NOT like that.
And don't let her painted potato head scare you away..scroll down to
the silk scarf-oh yeah....baby!

4. ACottageMuse Sandi (whose name should be Sandirella or something
swirly and ruffly like that) has a dreaming-of-white blog. You will love her
thrift shop finds.

You know the worst part of this whole thing is deciding who gets
The Award
There are SOOO many people out there that deserve an award..
it's like how do I begin to pick?
So...I picked those that have been commenting..
and following...
There were those that I would have liked to give it to that
have a NO AWARDS sticker...
Yeah...they probably got stuck doing this about a
gazillion times and now they are ashamed of
spilling the beans about themselves...
or...some of them could be wanted by
the IRS and don't want to make themselves
too available...
And there are those that have so many followers that
I figured they have done this more than they ever
hoped they would have to...so I hesitated to ask them...
Well, whatever...
Just know that if you have found me here
I love having you here and will
do my best to include you
in any way I can..
so...if I didn't give you
an award...
and you thinkyou deserve one..
please send me cash...
I might get another chance to do this.
Yeah...maybe...

And, Laurie...Thank You-love you girl!
(You owe me BIG time) Diana

Monday, August 23, 2010

The Good, The Bad, The Ugly

It started out to be a fine day-
I called my daughter, Mimi,
to see if she wanted to meet
halfway between houses
and go "junking".
Ooooh...what shall we find?
Look at THIS!Nope! Sorry-we didn't find THAT..
How about THIS?
Could this place get any cooler?
Nope we couldn't find a place like that either.
Please...please...please...don't write me and
ask WHERE these places are...
cuz I just don't know...
I cut them out of a magazine somewhere
and now they exist just in my
imagination-but if YOU
know where they are-
please let ME know.
No-when I met Mimi
our little baby E was propped up
in a cart
looking like this...
Doesn't he look like a little
Irish elf?
It's okay..
you can say it...
we all know it..
Notice the lovely racks of clothes behind him?
I am especially fond of the multi-colored polka dot shirt.
It would look nice with my orange
pullover sweatshirt..
(which will match the ORANGE drive-about that
MyHero is trying to place in our garage-see yesterday's post
if you missed THAT story)

However...I digress...
Pay attention-we are now back on topic.
When you call BabyE's name
he turns and sweetly gives you THIS look...
That hair! Oh! I love that hair!
His Mom had hair like that when she was little.
They shared another attribute too.
Screeching...
Not your normal wailing and crying..
No I am talking out and out
train whistle piercing screeching.
I am talking about
this kind of screeching...
The break the glass type of ear-splitting..
makes me want to put my head
under my armpit
kind of screeching.
In the store..
In the thrift store...
In the thrift store with other people...
In the thrift store with mean old lady ugly people
A lady that is so unhappy with her life and situation
that she has become MEAN
and she wants everyone to KNOW she is mean!
Yeah...one that looks kind of like THIS!

You will find her at Ugly People
I didn't dare take a picture of the real one..

I was afraid she might clock me with her cane.

She could have looked over and grinned and made

some casual, funny remark about

screechy kids...(which I would have probably done)

Instead she said...THAT CHILD SHOULDN'T BE IN HERE..

In kind of an under-her-breath-just-loud-enough-to-overhear-it

kind of voice.

I was a little bit embarrassed until she walked away...

Wait- Wait- What was that noise?

Mimi & I look at each other puzzled...

She says- MOM!!! I say..MOM WHAT?

Well-what's that noise, MO-OM?

Huh? Was it thunder?

Was it? No it couldn't be THAT!

As she was walking away, still muttering

about the NOISE and BEHAVIOR of a one year old,

the purr of gas escaping continued to

ripple behind her rolling cart.

I lost all sense of being embarrassed about a screechy kid...

I now realized that the two of them probably had something

in common after all. They were both wearing diapers (I hope).

There was a part of me that just felt a bit sad for her...and...

we were trying not to laugh..because getting old ain't for sissies.

I am feeling a bit bad for her-had she been a tad kinder I

would have felt really AWFUL for her...

But-shame on me-I laughed....and laughed...and laughed...

we put our heads in between the rows of hanging things (Lord, please

let me know that they were clean things) and we laughed...and laughed...

as BabyE continued to screech and she continued to complain...and "toot"..

Two different "trains" on two different life tracks.

And...the monkey riding this train

will get cuter by the day...

Eventually the screeching will stop....

he will change and start growing up....

and he will start talking like a regular little boy..

After all-he only just turned one.

And Granny? Well, God bless her...

Her train apparently has a gas engine

rather than a steamer.

Sunday, August 22, 2010

Did you say Buckingham Palace?

I was going to write about my
Anniversary get away..
but this...well...this
supersedes that!
Indeed it does!
I came home early from work because
MyHero called and said he wanted
to show me something special.
Ooooohhh...I LIKE surprises..
.....usually.....
We drive North about 30 miles to Door County.
Where are we going I want to know.
You'll see-is the answer.
Hmmmmm...looks pretty good..like the stonework.
Okay then...I LIKE the name of this place..
It's kind of dark in here but it doesn't smell
like smoke...all public places here
are smoke free as of July 1st..
Yeah...I'm liking that
AND
it has granite topped booths..
So far...so good!

Are ya with me here?
Hmmmm...eyes are adjusting to the light.
What's that at the end of the booth.
When I said I wanted MyHero to have a 6 pack
this wasn't exactly what I meant.
Oh yeah...Wisconsin has its
own rules.
I glance up..
What's that hanging over my head?
Why it's a wasp's nest...
of course it is...
Ah...sorry about the picture
quality..it was kind of hard to
see and I didn't want to drag out my tripod
and angle lights..
People might talk...and...
they might not feed me.
I glance slowly behind me..
Oh. My. Good. Lord.
They have killed Bambi,
stuffed him,
mounted him,
and placed him
under the head of his mother.Okay...I could have taken a hundred
flipping pictures
each one showing a
DIFFERENT animal..
but I will stop with this one...
which was straight way across
from our booth.
Cute, huh?
Yeah....He needs a bit of flossing I think.Not to be outdone by the hunters in the family
the bowlers have put on their
proud display.Nice place-I tell MyHero.
I know-he says-smiling broadly!I must say the food was DEEEliscious
and the drinks were COLD
and the food was HOT
and the portions were
KING sized-get it? Castle? King?
Never mind
MyHero tells me to hurry up
this is NOT the surprise..
I start looking for the door...
Aha! There it is..
cleverly stationed beneath
the GIANT stuffed fish!We drive a few blocks.
Close your eyes...MyHero intones.
I can't-I reply...I'm driving...
Oh yeah then...
don't look to your right yet.
Wait.....wait...wait...okay
NOW you can look.
I am standing in front of a
For Sale sign.
This does not bode well...
because I really don't want to
BUY ANYTHING.
When he sees this post he will want me
to remove this part...
because he won't want anyone
to beat him to this great deal.
I can hear him now....couldn't you have
erased the information off before you posted it?
Nope!
Here's the shiny door thingy..Is your little heart beating fast and furious?
Do you think you can stand it?
Are you going to die because
YOU don't have anything like this?
Huh?
Ready?
A peek through the window
(because the sucker is locked)
shows a beautiful, gorgeous
burnt orange interior..
yeah...remember those?
It also has a microwave from that era.
Great! I can stand in front of it
and do my own tumor treatments.
(should I ever need them)
Radiation Plus!
Ohhhh...he says...
wait til you see how nice the couches are...
they fold down into beds..
WHOOOOPEEEE..
The light glowing from said couches
almost blinds me..
Nice-I tell him.
I know-he says.
Next he enthusiastically whips me to
the back window.
Where I climb up on a doohickey that holds
something...who knows what..
and I see
THIS.
It's a toilet/sink/bath combo.
With orange curtains.
Yeaaaa...it matches the front end perfectly!
Ooooh...I'm loving that
retro wallpaper..
Gollleeee..I just can't wait
to get inside.
Please take note of the
orange shag carpet!
You don't see that much anymore.And now...for the outside...
Well, MyHero, finally asks
trying to contain his excitement.
What do you think?
Think?
Was I supposed to be thinking about this?
Hmmm...well...I tell him..
I really HATE... the ORANGE!
Oh- don't worry about that-
We can paint that-
We can get rid of all the orange-
It will be all cream colored when we're done.
It will look just like a pearl..
It can be your anniversary present..
Yeah? Well, let me tell you buddy..
That was NOT the kind of pearl
I had in mind!
I meant THIS KIND!Yeah, You girls think this is funny?
Huh? Do you?
Just wait til I pull this sucker into your driveway
and you have to explain to your neighbors
WHO you know
that is driving
The Pearl!